Being authentic is in. But what does it mean? and can you be authentic 100% of the time?
What if you're having a bad day? Would you tell your customer that you're not in the mood to even pick up the phone. Not because you're unwell but because you just can't be bothered?
Or that you think their idea is bonkers and they are wasting their time?
Would you tell someone that what they are wearing doesn't suit them? Be it in relationship or a stranger on the street.
Is being authentic something we can be and do 100% of time? Hardly.
So how to be true to yourself without offending people with your honesty? (Not easy, trust me. I have no filter and the looks I get!)
Building healthy personal boundaries is a good start. By not agreeing to take on everything that comes your way you are choosing what suits your life, personality and ability. Respecting yourself will show others what you are and aren't willing to accept. This in turn will make you more motivated to do the tasks you chose to do. Now, I know are things we all have to do even if they're not what we want (like housework, cleaning the car...) however with clear communication you can work out the best way to tackle those without resentment and/or upsetting someone.
Being your true self is also understanding different states you operate from. IN 1953 Eric Berne developed an idea that we can change between different states of mind, sometimes even in the same conversation and certainly in different areas of our lives. The idea is based on three states we all operate from The Parent, The Child and The Adult. You can read more about different states in my post Are you Employees Behaving like Children?
So yes, you can be authentic but even your Authentic Self comes in many forms, or at least three. The key to keep your relationships healthy business going you have to be aware which state you're operating from and choose the right one for the occasion. One that is going to improve your reputation and keep your job.
If you want to learn more about you, people, behaviour, have a look at our Tuesday Morning and Thursday Brunch Quickies - series of mini session covering topics to help you understand yourself and others better.